Dear Kids… (August 2011)

Sep 7, 2011 by Nathan

Posted under: Funny, Parenting

How would you handle five kids, where four are boys and three of them are triplet boys? Here’s how my friend Amy does it quite valiantly via her Facebook status updates during the month of August.

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8/24/11 – Dear Kids~ Hate to be the killjoy once again… but the game in which you stand in the front yard, drinking glasses of water, and spitting them at each other.. is OVER! Love Always, Mom

8/23/11 – From the mouth of a (to remain nameless) son of mine: “Mom… have you ever touched the tip of your tongue to a 9-volt battery?” I told him no and “surprise” correctly guessed that he did just that today!

8/23/11 – Dear Kids~ Instead of standing at the dishwasher and screaming to me: “MOM IS IT CLEAN OR DIRTY!?”.. why not open it up and look?!?! Just an idea!

8/18/11 – good thing our swing set was moved directly under a tree in our backyard…. it has now become… ladder to the tree… the kids been climbing on TOP of the monkey bars and up into the tree!!! Boys will be boys I guess!

8/13/11 – is getting her roof done and was a little nervous looking up and seeing Blake, who wears glasses, up on the roof “helping” WITHOUT his glasses on! The edge of a roof is not the place to be without your glasses!!!!!

8/11/11 – is thankful she caught the child who had the staple gun before anything besides the front lawn got stapled!!!!!

8/7/11 – Dear Kids (and Tim)~ If you’re looking for shoes to wear to church this morning, check out the front yard. Between the stoop, lawn and driveway, I’ve counted 7 pairs! And, thanks to the rain last night, they are all freshly washed!!

8/6/11 – Attention Everyone: The world may be ending… I saw the floor in each one of the kiddos rooms tonight!! I repeat… the world may be ending! :)

8/6/11 – Dear Kids~ Thank you for gathering some of your things to sell at our garage sale. Your effort to get rid of some of your clothes and toys was much appreciated. However, I am doubtful that the wadded up shirt with dirt crusted to it is gonna be a hot item. Let’s at least aim for clean =) Always the killjoy, Mom

8/5/11 – is thankful the Hoarding show doesn’t have a “Mini Van Hoarding” edition…. I am almost certain I’d be I’d be nominated it for it…. but make no mistake… no matter what my van may seem to indicate… I am not a Mini Van Hoarder… I am just prepared for any and all situations!!

8/3/11 – LOVES to see her 5 kiddos playing happily together… the calm before a storm? Perhaps… but I’ll take it!! :)

8/2/11 – Tim to kids (said as he’s holding up a pair of socks found in the back yard): “OK… where’s the Bozo…??” Zoey’s (instantaneous) response… pointing to each of her brothers, “there, there, there and there!”

8/1/11 – Tim to kids: “Why are Zoey’s sneakers in such better shape than yours boys!?” Zoey:”Because I’M A GIRL!” I have to say…. she might be on to something… I haven’t found her sneakers in the lawn, sandbox, van, recycling bin, under the trampoline or other random places!!!

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Here are the updates from the previous months.

4/29/11 – Dear Snow Bird Neighbors (who returned yesterday!)~ Welcome home! Sorry for all the chaos & noise over here…. its been a long winter and we are still recovering from cabin fever. We completely understand and take no offense if you decide to return to Florida immediately!!! Love, your crazy neighbors!!4/29/11 – Dear Boys~ I really just don’t even want to know how long you’ve been out of toilet paper in your bathroom downstairs…or what you’ve been using in its place! In case you’ve forgotten, there’s a large supply in the closet upstairs! Please send a representative to retrieve some as soon as you run out! Thank you! Once again the killjoy, Mom ?4/28/11 – Dear Kids… there are candy wrappers and empty juice boxes all over the playroom… did you guys host some kind of rockin party I don’t know about!? :) Always the killjoy, Mom ?4/26/11 – Woohoo.. the owner of the toothbrush, has claimed and removed it from the front yard… now if the owner of the undies will kindly remove those.. we will be back to our normal chaos! =)

4/25/11 – Dear Kids~ A toothbrush on the lawn is one thing, the pair of underwear on the step going into the house is quite another. Would the owner kindly remove them PROMPTLY! Forever the killjoy, Mom ?

4/25/11 – To the kid with the purple toothbrush, its in the front yard. You might want to rinse it off before using! Always the killjoy, Mom ?

4/14/11 – Dear Kids~ We live on an acre of land. Must you stand on the same blade of grass and fight all day!? Its time to separate!!!! Always the killjoy, Mom ?